Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.
Well it is about time I added a page about me. Usually that is the first thing on any blog. After so much criticism on my personality, and having my personality be blamed for all experiences at Haven, I have left it out in order to put the experiences themselves forefront. Furthermore, I was taught that calling myself a writer, addict, etc, meant that I wanted to be special. Anything outside of my own brokenness was arrogance. The addict thing I don’t get, it seems that anything originating from myself was wanting to be special, that is the best explanation I have been able to come up with.
A friend tells me that bios for writing should have your best thing and worst thing. But you don’t want my worst thing! Nor could I possibly offer that up.
I wish this were a blog against Scientology so I could watch someone try to make a whoisjilltalbot.com website. I am cringing at the cliche but perhaps I am not entirely sure who that is either. There is also another writer named Jill Talbot who has written on addiction whom I am sometimes confused with. I also go by my birth name McCuish sometimes (I was adopted.)
I was born in Vancouver, was involved with Haven off and on from aged 11-29, studied psychology at SFU, dropped out, got off heroin, ended up living on Gabriola, started to get writing published, wrote this blog. That is the TL;DR version. Which is perhaps the best that can ever come.
According to mental health:
Argumentative, provocative and suspicious (my personal all-time fav)
Intelligent and well-read but lacks insight into condition.
Appears psychotic, soft-spoken with a lisp, stares out of windows, laughs inappropriately.
According to Haven:
Narcissist, arrogant, wants to be special, entitled, untrustworthy, blaming, inadequate follower.
According to friends:
You are just weird, just Jill. Why do you need another label?
None of the claims made by Haven or Mental Health were meant for my personal amusement. That is how I approach them. According to them, that means I am in denial. Amusement, however, may have saved my life. To give them back what they have given me is more freeing than trying to bury it, disown it, or cover it up.
If you want the covered-up version, I have a few places I could refer you to.
In defiance of wanting to be special claims–I have appeared in Geist, Rattle, The Puritan, Matrix and subTerrain, was shortlisted for the Matrix Lit Pop Award in 2015 and the Malahat Far Horizons Award in 2016, had a staged reading of my play put on by Western Edge Theatre in 2015 and another one of my plays was commended by the BBC.
PS- When I was 15 Jock described my writing as nothing special.
Some links to writing available online: