Correction to Catch-22 post:
It was impossible for anyone to listen before I wrote this bitter blog because silence was all I had left. After I wrote it many did listen. Just not the ones with power. But it’s impossible to listen any less than never. I did it the Haven way for years… There is still a catch, but the catch is that it doesn’t matter how I try.
This is the usual message: You don’t express yourself properly, aren’t responsible, aren’t curious…
One time a leader even criticized me for using a double negative. That would make sense if she were an editor, it didn’t make sense when I was trying to express frustration in a counselling session.
After all of this, I still do their job for them by putting my personality back on trial. Bitterness may have saved my life for finally something was mine.
The trolling, of course, is easy to judge. I won’t defend it. But I also will not pathologize it.
It’s nearing time for the hearing, the time I said I would quit this and focus on other things… Trying to purge out any stories I have left but there’s nothing screaming to get out. There’s no more silence, just a purring cat, cuppa coffee and something not like a resolution.
Judge as you wish, I couldn’t have ended anything with this amount of suggestive peace before.
Doesn’t seem like much to you… Maybe the suggestion is more powerful than the real thing.
I guess that 2 negatives do make a positive. Perhaps my grammar was a Freudian slap.